You are a Hyderabadi, if…

Copied from Contribution by Amarnath Dixit

1. Your address reads as 23-404-32/67A-43 (New MCH number 56-678/4A/B-22),while you actually live in the second house beside zamzam cafe in lane behind Anand Theatre on SP Road.

2. You end up buying only a salwar kameez, whether it is a theatre workshop, food mela, consumer expo, designer jewellery show, science show or an automobile convention.

3. Your street has at least one roadside mobile hotel that serves Chinese delicacies such as ” Vegetable soft needles”, “Navrotten Kurma”, “Chicken Manchewurea” or “American Chompsee”.

4. Your answer is ’seedha chale jao’ when somebody asks you for directions,whether it is to Malakpet, Masab Tank, Malkajgiri or Moosapet.

5. You come across tailors sporting the board: ‘Immidiot delivery in two days onli’.

6.You can speak Hindi, Urdu, hyderabadi hinglish, except Telugu, fluently.

7.You ask the waiter to get you some ‘Aam ka achaar’ even if you are sitting at a lavish continental banquet dinner with exotic Chinese, Mexican, Italian and Lebanese cuisines.

8. You order for a tea just after having had a Caramel custard.

9. You have at least one Srinivas, Prasad, Raju, Rao or Venkatesh within six square feet. OR you have at least one cousin, friend, colleague or acquaintance with these names.

10. You have at least one cousin, friend, colleague or acquaintance in the US in software.

11. Every time somebody gives you a piece of good news, the first thing you ask them is ‘Party kab hain ?’

12. Refer to any past as ‘parso’, be it yesterday or long before three hu ndred years.

13. You call 11 AM as subah subah.

14. You label your boss as ‘Dimakh Kharab’

15. And it doesn’t matter where in the “Gulf/middle east” you are leaving you always tell you are going to “Dubai “. (I know of one family who still keep telling everyone their son is in “uno Dubai mein hai” but he is physically in Yemen for the past 5 years.

16. You are 15 minutes late and you feel you are on time.

17. You look at the fixed pr ice stand and still ask ‘dene ka bolo’

18. If you do not eat rice at least once a day you will die.(Nothing other than Rice is considered as a meal)

19. You feel offended by someone looking at you (Kaiku ghoor raa be?)

20. You think you are a born shayer and use some typical filmi batein in stylish urdu and crack some romantic jokes.

21. While someone does the above, you say to yourself ‘chubbe saale ,mooh dekh aaine mein, tere ku kaun pat thi, pataaney waala tho main hi hoon’

22. You can say the typical “Light le le baap” a nd be cool without analyzing what the situation is.

23. You feel its legal and your Nizami birth right to show your hand and stop the traffic (better than a traffic police) while you cross the road whenever and wherever you like.

24. You can hang out in a Irani cafe the whole day after ordering one cup tea and a empty saucer for yourself and your dear friend and you chat like thats the last day with each other.

25. You eat Paradise Biryani or bawarchi Biryani atleast once in a month

26. You go to the Petrol Bunk and say “Panch Point Single Oil maaro yaaro” and hand over 15 bucks.

27. You can relate the words ‘Nakko’, ‘Hou’ ‘Kaiku’ ,’hallu’ and make these the integral part of your vocabulary.

28. You tell your friend that you will ‘just come back’ (”abbhi aathu mein”) and your friend knows that either you will take a couple of hours or not come back at all.

29. You end up watching every movie you come across , and end up saying oh! that was good , but it could be better if it was made that way

30. You are reading this and secretly admitting that you are, after all, a true blue Hyderabadi [J] You know one thing….. Once a Hyderabadi, always a Hyderabadi… and you will forward this site for sure to Hyderabadis … because only they can relate to it.